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Episode

#3709: Ashtabula

Mike O'Meara, Robb Spewak, Josh Sroka

September 15, 2026 · 1 hr 22 min

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Show notes

The show welcomes a highly questionable new sponsor from Ashtabula, Ohio—and Robb somehow knows the town thanks to a deep-cut song from a Drew Carey Show album. Mike declares war on dashboard rubber ducks, discovers what is actually inside Yoo-hoo, and realizes everyone he once considered young is now fully middle-aged. The great doggy-diaper experiment is officially underway, although Mike’s own emergency visit to the Sprouts restroom suggests the hounds may not be the only ones who need a backup plan. Robb unveils his Birkenstock boots, the boys debate a Hyrox champion who powered through a profoundly messy race, and Josh receives the shortest personal check-in in broadcasting history. Plus, retirement talk gets real, a Florida deer takes an unauthorized swim, and artificial intelligence finally achieves its highest purpose: telling Nellie Oleson exactly where she can go.

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TranscriptRead Transcript · EN

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[SPEAKER_09]: This episode of the Michael Mery Show is brought to you by the TMOS Amazon Portal.

[SPEAKER_09]: Remember to click the Amazon link at TMOSpodcast.com before you shop.

[SPEAKER_09]: It's that easy.

[SPEAKER_09]: Thank you.

[SPEAKER_09]: Now, on with the show.

[SPEAKER_02]: And now stay tuned for the best of Carson.

[SPEAKER_06]: Michael Mery, radio entertainment.

[SPEAKER_06]: You can listen to the Michael Mero Show at TMOs.com or anywhere find podcasts or fun.

[SPEAKER_06]: Welcome to our show.

[SPEAKER_06]: We're going to start the race.

[SPEAKER_04]: It's got to be fucking looking at my phone.

[SPEAKER_06]: There's money for everyone.

[SPEAKER_06]: It's the Michael Mero Show with Michael Mero.

[SPEAKER_06]: Bye!

[SPEAKER_06]: Josh Rooka.

[SPEAKER_06]: And Rob Speedway.

[SPEAKER_09]: It's only the beginning and now here's Mike and very very exciting always very very exciting on the show when we welcome a new sponsor as well as Amazon we welcome a brand new sponsor to the show and I could tell you about it but it's better to get this spokesperson great this portion of the show well the entire show today brought to you by the artificial limb and brace store let's roll the commercial right now ladies and gentlemen take it away the

[SPEAKER_03]: You're an astronaut, Ohio, be sure to swing on by an artificial limb and brace of astubula.

[SPEAKER_03]: Say you're walking along my, and you're on business, you look down on one of your arms, the legs are missing.

[SPEAKER_03]: Don't worry about it, artificial limb and brace of astubula sky you covered.

[SPEAKER_03]: Maybe you do got legs and arms, you just want to hold them in place.

[SPEAKER_03]: Get a fucking brace at artificial limb and brace of astubula.

[SPEAKER_03]: Or maybe you just don't like to take any chance that you got two legs, two arms, but you just want to back up.

[SPEAKER_03]: Fuck it, artificial limb and brace of astubula.

[SPEAKER_03]: Fuck it.

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh my, that's what they've been used.

[SPEAKER_07]: It couldn't crop out that, that cough at the end.

[SPEAKER_09]: That's taboo you.

[SPEAKER_09]: I don't know where Ash taboo is.

[SPEAKER_09]: I think it is a, I can't even say Ash taboo.

[SPEAKER_08]: I think it's a suburb of Cleveland because Drew Carey mentions it in one of his theme songs to show the Drew Carey show.

[SPEAKER_09]: So how does that exist in your brain?

[SPEAKER_08]: I don't know.

[SPEAKER_08]: How does that?

[SPEAKER_08]: But you know, I've been thinking actually about this so amazing.

[SPEAKER_09]: I mean, those are the ones that they're not common.

[SPEAKER_09]: You don't do it every day.

[SPEAKER_09]: They can do it like once every week, probably.

[SPEAKER_09]: And those are the ones that really, what was that fact?

[SPEAKER_09]: Give us this fee.

[SPEAKER_09]: It jumps off the page.

[SPEAKER_08]: What was that fact again?

[SPEAKER_08]: Well, I believe that the Drew Carey show is said in Cleveland.

[SPEAKER_08]: Because you're hedging.

[SPEAKER_08]: You said, believe now.

[SPEAKER_08]: Why are you?

[SPEAKER_08]: Why are you losing confidence?

[SPEAKER_08]: because he also did another theme song called, uh, moon over parma.

[SPEAKER_07]: Right.

[SPEAKER_07]: Which is another southern rock's theme of his exactly.

[SPEAKER_08]: But he mentions Estabula in moon over parma.

[SPEAKER_09]: Moon over parma.

[SPEAKER_09]: That one, right?

[SPEAKER_09]: Exactly.

[SPEAKER_09]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_08]: And I've been actually looking to get an artificial limb for carry for Christmas, you know, just as a stocking stuffer.

[SPEAKER_07]: And it does look like it is a suburb of Cleveland.

[SPEAKER_07]: There it is.

[SPEAKER_07]: You got it right.

[SPEAKER_09]: This episode of the Michael Mery Show is brought to you by the TMOS Amazon Portal. [SPEAKER_09]: Remember to click the Amazon link at TMOSpodcast.com before you shop. [SPEAKER_09]: It's that easy. [SPEAKER_09]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_09]: Now, on with the show. [SPEAKER_02]: And now stay tuned for the best of Carson. [SPEAKER_06]: Michael Mery, radio entertainment. [SPEAKER_06]: You can listen to the Michael Mero Show at TMOs.com or anywhere find podcasts or fun. [SPEAKER_06]: Welcome to our show. [SPEAKER_06]: We're going to start the race. [SPEAKER_04]: It's got to be fucking looking at my phone. [SPEAKER_06]: There's money for everyone. [SPEAKER_06]: It's the Michael Mero Show with Michael Mero. [SPEAKER_06]: Bye! [SPEAKER_06]: Josh Rooka. [SPEAKER_06]: And Rob Speedway. [SPEAKER_09]: It's only the beginning and now here's Mike and very very exciting always very very exciting on the show when we welcome a new sponsor as well as Amazon we welcome a brand new sponsor to the show and I could tell you about it but it's better to get this spokesperson great this portion of the show well the entire show today brought to you by the artificial limb and brace store let's roll the commercial right now ladies and gentlemen take it away the [SPEAKER_03]: You're an astronaut, Ohio, be sure to swing on by an artificial limb and brace of astubula. [SPEAKER_03]: Say you're walking along my, and you're on business, you look down on one of your arms, the legs are missing. [SPEAKER_03]: Don't worry about it, artificial limb and brace of astubula sky you covered. [SPEAKER_03]: Maybe you do got legs and arms, you just want to hold them in place. [SPEAKER_03]: Get a fucking brace at artificial limb and brace of astubula. [SPEAKER_03]: Or maybe you just don't like to take any chance that you got two legs, two arms, but you just want to back up. [SPEAKER_03]: Fuck it, artificial limb and brace of astubula. [SPEAKER_03]: Fuck it. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh my, that's what they've been used. [SPEAKER_07]: It couldn't crop out that, that cough at the end. [SPEAKER_09]: That's taboo you. [SPEAKER_09]: I don't know where Ash taboo is. [SPEAKER_09]: I think it is a, I can't even say Ash taboo. [SPEAKER_08]: I think it's a suburb of Cleveland because Drew Carey mentions it in one of his theme songs to show the Drew Carey show. [SPEAKER_09]: So how does that exist in your brain? [SPEAKER_08]: I don't know. [SPEAKER_08]: How does that? [SPEAKER_08]: But you know, I've been thinking actually about this so amazing. [SPEAKER_09]: I mean, those are the ones that they're not common. [SPEAKER_09]: You don't do it every day. [SPEAKER_09]: They can do it like once every week, probably. [SPEAKER_09]: And those are the ones that really, what was that fact? [SPEAKER_09]: Give us this fee. [SPEAKER_09]: It jumps off the page. [SPEAKER_08]: What was that fact again? [SPEAKER_08]: Well, I believe that the Drew Carey show is said in Cleveland. [SPEAKER_08]: Because you're hedging. [SPEAKER_08]: You said, believe now. [SPEAKER_08]: Why are you? [SPEAKER_08]: Why are you losing confidence? [SPEAKER_08]: because he also did another theme song called, uh, moon over parma. [SPEAKER_07]: Right. [SPEAKER_07]: Which is another southern rock's theme of his exactly. [SPEAKER_08]: But he mentions Estabula in moon over parma. [SPEAKER_09]: Moon over parma. [SPEAKER_09]: That one, right? [SPEAKER_09]: Exactly. [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_08]: And I've been actually looking to get an artificial limb for carry for Christmas, you know, just as a stocking stuffer. [SPEAKER_07]: And it does look like it is a suburb of Cleveland. [SPEAKER_07]: There it is. [SPEAKER_07]: You got it right. [SPEAKER_07]: You got it right. [SPEAKER_08]: And you know what's really sad about that is that is preventing out from Cleveland. [SPEAKER_08]: A useful fact from being in my head. [SPEAKER_08]: That's a stop gap right there. [SPEAKER_09]: Right. [SPEAKER_08]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_09]: But you could you could jam useful facts into your brain when you had to. [SPEAKER_09]: That's how you got good grades. [SPEAKER_08]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_07]: If you would have not said from the Dukary show, then it sounds like a really smart like you know geography. [SPEAKER_08]: Well, yeah, but people would they would say, no, you don't know jargher, he's an idiot. [SPEAKER_08]: How does he know that? [SPEAKER_08]: But if I can align it with a team, you can turn. [SPEAKER_09]: Yes, it is. [SPEAKER_08]: If I can align it with a TV theme, then it's more right. [SPEAKER_02]: If it's your turn. [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_09]: It always means I got to play that clearly. [SPEAKER_09]: Jesus Christ. [SPEAKER_08]: Oh, it's your turn. [SPEAKER_09]: We'll chop to the front. [SPEAKER_08]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_09]: There we go. [SPEAKER_09]: Oh, it's more like a ob. [SPEAKER_08]: We have, but you got two bees in there. [SPEAKER_08]: And I appreciate that. [SPEAKER_09]: I understand. [SPEAKER_09]: Let me, uh, hold on a second. [SPEAKER_09]: Let me see if I can find a better rob here. [SPEAKER_09]: Hold on. [SPEAKER_08]: Oh, you did some hunting, did you? [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_09]: I'm always, I'm always thinking. [SPEAKER_09]: I know. [SPEAKER_08]: I know. [SPEAKER_09]: I just don't have one. [SPEAKER_09]: It doesn't, uh, it doesn't exist. [SPEAKER_08]: But your off-switch doesn't allow you to know what, ashtribule it is. [SPEAKER_09]: I got this. [SPEAKER_09]: Hold on a second. [UNKNOWN]: All right. [SPEAKER_09]: All right, I'm looking now. [SPEAKER_00]: Well, it's just yesterday you were talking to Sam constantly, and yeah, I'm home, Rob. [SPEAKER_00]: Well, it's just yesterday you were talking to Sam constantly, and yeah, I'm home, Rob. [UNKNOWN]: There you go. [SPEAKER_05]: All right, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, [SPEAKER_05]: We met at Ashtabula, she was doing a whole lot. [SPEAKER_05]: I handed her my radishes and pledged my love that night. [SPEAKER_05]: Moon over parma, want you bring my love to me. [SPEAKER_08]: It's not a real song, is it? [SPEAKER_08]: I couldn't, that I cannot tell you. [SPEAKER_08]: I do not know. [SPEAKER_08]: I know that that's not the one. [SPEAKER_07]: But did someone else write it beforehand? [SPEAKER_08]: That is not the one they used as the theme. [SPEAKER_08]: The theme is actually shorter. [SPEAKER_05]: Very good. [SPEAKER_05]: Moon over, come, I'll bring my love to me tonight Guide her to Cleveland, underneath your silvery light [SPEAKER_05]: We're going bowling, is that I'm lizard and soul, and moon over parma tonight. [SPEAKER_08]: Now here's what's really troubling, now that I hear it. [SPEAKER_08]: Ash Tabula is not in the TV theme. [SPEAKER_08]: It's in a song that's on the Drew Carey Show album. [SPEAKER_08]: That's a long version of the TV theme, so it is a much deeper dive than even I thought. [SPEAKER_07]: Okay. [SPEAKER_07]: All right. [SPEAKER_07]: That's a parma. [SPEAKER_07]: Parma is a suburb of Cleveland and that song was written by Cleveland, musician Bob McWyer. [SPEAKER_08]: Of course, Bob McWyer, you know him, Mike. [SPEAKER_09]: I know Bob. [SPEAKER_09]: I know Bob. [SPEAKER_09]: What about Bob? [SPEAKER_08]: Thanks. [SPEAKER_08]: Welcome. [SPEAKER_08]: He's your uncle. [SPEAKER_09]: Welcome to the Michael Mary Show. [SPEAKER_09]: This is very interesting. [SPEAKER_09]: Hi, energy. [SPEAKER_09]: Start to the show today, ladies and gentlemen. [SPEAKER_09]: New driving pet peeve that I want to get [SPEAKER_09]: for all of those that have those fucking plastic baby ducks on your dash board fuck you and of course you wrote in and what's that their jeeps right well their jeeps and i've seen them on broncos too i think maybe or is it just a jeep thing i think it's a jeep thing i think it's a jeep thing i think it's a sex thing [SPEAKER_09]: What do you mean a sex thing? [SPEAKER_09]: You know, like it's sex with ducks? [SPEAKER_08]: No, no, no, it's like the people that put the rocks in the yard, the light, you know, that they're open for anything. [SPEAKER_09]: I mean, you just, are you just opening your mouth and seeing what comes out? [SPEAKER_09]: Do you really have a information on that? [SPEAKER_07]: No, I'm just saying it seems like it could be a sex thing. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, but the rock thing is a duck, a duck per partner, because some of them have like about a hundred ducks on their dash. [SPEAKER_08]: If you have a hundred ducks on your dash, you are open for anything. [SPEAKER_09]: I don't know what it is. [SPEAKER_09]: I don't know what it is. [SPEAKER_09]: And is it exclusive to, uh, one particular section, is it a, is it a, is it a Jeep lady thing, it's just a Jeep owner thing. [SPEAKER_09]: Oh, you mean, like, man do it, too? [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [SPEAKER_07]: Like if you have a cheap you like leave ducks on other chips. [SPEAKER_09]: Where do we see ducks? [SPEAKER_09]: We see ducks on our last cruise. [SPEAKER_07]: The cruise. [SPEAKER_07]: It's a cruise thing as well. [SPEAKER_09]: Lucky ducks, right? [SPEAKER_09]: Oh, okay. [SPEAKER_09]: They're all over the casino. [SPEAKER_09]: Lucky ducks. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, the cheap owners refer to it as the cheap owners refer to it as duck duck cheap [SPEAKER_07]: We'll give a small rubber cheap on other people's jeeps to spread to make them not as small rubber cheap. [SPEAKER_09]: You mean a small rubber duck on other people's jeeps. [SPEAKER_09]: Yes. [SPEAKER_09]: So you so you can trade with your friends. [SPEAKER_09]: Apparently so. [SPEAKER_09]: All right. [SPEAKER_09]: Well, that's like a leave one. [SPEAKER_09]: Take one or something. [SPEAKER_09]: Are they just like standard dumpster or like might as well spice up a shit car. [SPEAKER_08]: Yeah, I do or do they are they special can you get like dressed up ducks like like like like naughty ducks. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, you can get novelty ducks as well. [SPEAKER_09]: That's what I would do if I had a Jeep. [SPEAKER_09]: By the way, the mildly memory and I'm so old that I've and I'm a car person. [SPEAKER_09]: So I have had a number of automobiles and I did have a time in my life where I thought it would be cool to have a Jeep Wrangler. [SPEAKER_09]: I forgot about this era of money and this era of Mike took his Jeep Wrangler to the Jiffy Loub or one of those similar fast oil change facilities and the person did not put the cap on or at least didn't put it on properly and I'm 395 right next to the FBI building Washington. [SPEAKER_09]: He's seen my engine seized. [SPEAKER_09]: It's seized. [SPEAKER_09]: It did. [SPEAKER_09]: Did they take responsibility? [SPEAKER_09]: I think they did, I think they just money there that you didn't care. [SPEAKER_09]: It might have been the latter. [SPEAKER_09]: Yes, since you mentioned that. [SPEAKER_09]: I know. [SPEAKER_08]: The Jeep era of Mike preceded me, but also wasn't it... That's when Mike could get behind the wheel of a vehicle with a shirt off. [SPEAKER_08]: I was going to say, didn't it have to do with driving around with the top down with your shirt on? [SPEAKER_09]: A couple of times, did that like an asshole? [SPEAKER_08]: That was a young man! [SPEAKER_09]: I was a young man, Rob, I was a young man! [SPEAKER_08]: Sunny your days. [SPEAKER_08]: Was the Jeep the car that housed at the Bulldog? [SPEAKER_09]: You know, I'm coming into my neighborhood Today. [SPEAKER_09]: No, that was an accurate legend. [SPEAKER_08]: Okay. [SPEAKER_08]: Okay. [SPEAKER_09]: That was the first really cool car I got. [SPEAKER_09]: Yeah Even though it's not a c